It Isn't Very Pretty Anymore.

This is so touching. Found at Cafemom.com via Pinterest.

The wordings read:

"A mark for every breath you took, every blink, every sleepy yawn. One for every time you sucked your thumb, waved hello, closed your eyes and slept in the most perfect darkness. One for every time you had the hiccups. One for every dream you dreamed within me.

It isn't very pretty anymore. Some may even think it ugly. That's OK. It was your home. It's where I first grew to love you, where I lay my hand as I dreamed about who you were and who you would be. It held you until my arms could, and for that, I will always find something beautiful in it."

:`)

Say What Now?

Image from The Royal College of Psychiatrists 

I had a rather.. odd conversation with a single mother of one last weekend. It went something like this:

Me: I'm still breastfeeding.

Single Mother: What?! You're still BREASTFEEDING?!!

Me: *stunned by her outburst* Uh.. Yes.

Single Mother: *slaps her forehead* Oh.. my.. gosh..

Me: Why? What's wrong with that??

Single Mother: No. So, when you breastfeed, tak sakit ke? (touching her abdomen area)

Me: Sakit? No! Why would it be sakit??

Single Mother: No. I mean, you're still young.

Me: I'm sorry, but I don't think I get your point!!

Single Mother: No. I mean, a lot of doctors are not really encouraging breastfeeding nowadays.

Me: *dumbfounded* Huh?! What nonsense! Breast milk IS the best milk for babies. What are you talking about?!

Single Mother: I know giving your own milk will make your baby more obedient, but giving them plain water is good enough.

Me: (starting to lose all means of interest in continuing the conversation) I have to go now.

Mind you, she's a lovely person. But after speaking to her, I had a feeling that something's amiss. So I asked around, and yes, it turns out that she's not quite 'right', due to postpartum depression. The father of her child left her when she was pregnant. Kesian :(

10 Must-Haves

Mothers, what were your 10 must-haves when you were pregnant? Here's mine, just for the fun of it :)

1. Kentucky Fried Chicken
I would eat KFC at least once a week. At least! When I try to refrain from eating it, dear husband would come up to me and say "Sayang.. Dapat KFC pon sodap ni!". Haiyo, how to control lah like that?!

2. Oreo
My daily snack. It's no wonder I gained 18 kilos by the end of the pregnancy.


3. BabyCenter.com
The best website for parents and parents-to-be, ever. Enough said.

4. Baby Oil
Used to massage off the killer backache.

5. Air-conditioning
I would get so hot that I often stood naked in front of the AC. After a cold shower. At nighttime!

6. Cocoa Butter Oil & Lotion
I got a lil stretch mark here and there, but imagine how much more I could get if I didn't use any Cocoa Butter oil or lotion throughout the pregnancy. Penat tu nak sapu lotion keliling badan.


Image from Socialitelife.Celebuzz.com

7. Flat Shoes
I salute those pregnant women who can still strut around in high heels! It was flats for me all the way.

8. Leggings
Call me cheap, but there was no way I would spend hundreds of Ringgit on maternity pants. Good thing I have a small frame, so I could fit into normal leggings till the day the baby was born.

9. Breathe Right
I had a bad case of sinus between my 4th to 6th month of pregnancy. Both of my nostrils would get blocked that I had to breathe through my mouth. I tried everything from Vicks to nasal decongestant, but none of them worked. Then I found Breathe Right, and it worked wonders.


10. Husband
My ultimate must have. My dear husband who attended to my needs, patiently entertained my crazy pregnant woman's mood swings, massaged my back every night, called me beautiful even when I resemble a singa tengah kena sawan, and caressed and sweet-talked to my belly endlessly. I can't imagine how difficult it is for those pregnant women who has to go through the whole process without their husbands by their sides.

Labour Experience Story, 8 Months Later.

Fresh from the oven!

Reading about Noe and Ayuni's labour experiences made me realize that I should write about my own, so that it won't fade in memory (okay okay, I might have forgotten some details already). I mean, come on, giving birth to your first baby?! You HAVE to treasure that moment. This is going to be a long one. Okay, here we go.

I was in my 38th week. Work was piling at the office as if I won't be going on my maternity leave any time soon. I wanted to start passing on-going jobs to my coworkers, but my superiors said,

"Not just yet! Trust me, you will go past your due date. Now, go continue your work."

If you say so, boss.

While dumping more work on me, my ex-employer said,

"Oh, don't give me that pathetic I-am-pregnant look."

Right.

Later that evening after office hours, I went for my check-up. I told my gynae I was getting quite bad headaches lately, prolly due to the work stress. She checked my blood pressure and it was borderline high. Then she said she was going to perform a vajayjay check-up. Yeah, baby. Vajayjay check-up. I was dreading that moment. My husband had this horror look on his face as if he was the one going to receive it. So she put on her gloves, and in her hand went. My, how lovely that was (/endsarcasm). My husband swore I looked like I was ready to punch my gynae in the face.

Gynae: Oh! You're already dilating 2cm, my dear.
Me: I am?
Husband: (mulut melopong sambil mata terkebil-kebil)
Gynae: Yes, yes. Your water might break anytime tonight. When it does, come straight to the hospital. If it doesn't, then come tomorrow morning at 8:00am and we'll get you admitted. In the meantime, I'll give you some pills to help with your blood pressure.
Me: Yes, ma'am.
Husband: (mulut masih melopong, mata masih terkebil-kebil)

Then off we went to book our ward, went home, made phone calls to families and bosses, frantically pack our things and sent over to my parents' place. I couldn't sleep that night. I was scared that my water might break while I was sleeping and not notice it. I was nervous about giving birth which could happen any time then. I was ecstatic to finally meet the little fella I've been carrying around for 9 months.

Then the morning came, and my water didn't break. We woke up at 6:00am, did our Subuh prayers, and then by 7:00am we went to McDonald's for breakfast. My last, awesome, unhealthy meal before I started my confinement.

After breakfast, we went to the hospital, got admitted, changed into the hospital gown, got into the labour room, and that was when it all started to get blurry as everything happened so fast. There were more vajayjay check-ups, water breaking, high blood pressure, inducing, crying, painkillers, stoned, contractions. Somewhere in between all that, husband told me my senior manager sent a text asking about the status of an account that I was handling. Yeah.

By around 10:00am, my gynae informed me that my blood pressure was high, my baby's head was pointing upwards and his heartbeat got slower every time I had a contraction, therefore I had to get emergency C-section to avoid any complications. I didn't object. Get the baby out safely, that's what matters most. Zap zup zap, I was cut open while the doctors were talking and laughing like they were playing masak-masak with my belly. Husband was holding my hand and tried not to look at my bloody guts. Then my gynae said to me,

"Okay, now we're going to pull your baby out. You're going to feel a bit of a pressure on your stomach but it won't hurt."

I nodded. I felt the pressure, the tugging, and then the relief from my stomach. It was 11:39am. They quickly cleaned up my baby, and I could hear a distant cry. The doctor called my husband to recite Azan to him. Then the nurse came to me with my baby and asked me to give him a kiss. I was so drowsy on painkillers and everything happened so fast that I didn't get a chance to see his face properly. But I remember his cheek was so so warm. And I remember seeing his balls and thought,

"My. Those are big balls."

The first time I properly laid my eyes on our precious bundle of joy was in the ward room. It was surreal. Like, did I really go through all that? The morning sickness, the weight gain, the huge belly, the pregnancy discomforts, the operation, the whole shebang and now I have this little fella in my arms. It was such a small price to pay.

*pant*pant* Okay, penat type.

So there you have it, folks. The story of the beginning of my motherhood journey :)

Bittersweet Memories

Talking about being pregnant with my ex-schoolmate (who just gave birth to a beautiful baby girl) and ex-colleague (who is in her third trimester now) brought back some bittersweet memories when I was pregnant myself. Lots of memories, but these stood out the most.

On my 3rd month, my sister found my 4 year old nephew unconscious in the pool. He was on life support for 3 days, and the doctors couldn't give us any certainty that he would make it. Tears, grief and dark clouds surrounded our family. On the fourth day, God Almighty, my nephew woke up. For the first time ever, I believed in miracle.

On my 4th month, I got hospitalized for 4 days due to food poisoning after having satay at R&R Dengkil. That was my first time getting admitted into a hospital.

On my 5th month, due to the crazy pregnant women's hormones, a small misunderstanding with my mother lead to a huge, huge fight. Lots of shouts and tears, it was ugly. But we patch things up the next day. I'd have to say, that fight made our relationship better now.

On my 6th month, I was stopped by a man as I was about to go up to my office. He asked me whether I work there, passed me a projector and requested for me to hand it to my boss. The projector was heavy. I thought to myself,

"WTF is he thinking asking a pregnant woman carry this heavy thing?!"

But I kept my mouth shut and carried the darn thing up to the office. Later in the day, my boss came up to me and said that the man (who was his friend as it turned out) texted him saying:

"I passed the projector to the hot chick who works at your office."

That left me speechless for a minute there. So I guess he didn't notice me from the neck down. Either that, or he has a thing for pregnant women (which is a bit creepy if he does!).

On my 7th month, I stopped by Petronas on my way back home from work. It was 7pm. After filling the fuel, my car wouldn't start. The battery died. Oh, the joy it was. The alarm went off like mad, and all I got was looks and glances from other customers and workers who were mostly men. I tried calling my husband (who was still at the office) but there was no answer. I figured he must be praying as it was Maghrib time. After a good 5 minutes of me struggling, a man came up to me and said,

"Your car battery is dead"

and went off, not offering any help. Well, thank you for stating the obvious, mister. In the end, I called up my husband's friend who lives nearby the petrol pump. He showed up 5 minutes later and jump start my car. My lifesaver. God bless him.

And throughout the whole 9 months of being pregnant, there were only two times that someone let me jump the queue. Once was a man at the kedai makan, and the other one was a woman in a pharmacy. So much for getting special treatment for being pregnant, huh? Also, not to mention countless of dirty/weird looks from strangers (mostly Malays), as if saying,

"She's pregnant?? She looks young! Is she already married? Or is it a love child??"

Or maybe it was just me being perasan.

Baby's On The Way!

So you just receive the great news. You're expecting a new family member! That means bigger responsibilities, a change in lifestyle, and of course, a reason for a guilt-free shopping session. Though shopping for your new family member is fun, you need to be selective of your purchases as you don't want to over-spend on unnecessary items. Therefore, it is wise to prepare a checklist beforehand.

This checklist I'm sharing with you was compiled from the world wide web (I forgot to take down the exact sources, sorry!), tweaked and designed by yours truly. Just click on the pink one (for baby girl) or blue (for baby boy) to download the PDF file.

Kesan Regangan

Into my fourth month of pregnancy, I started slapping on different brands of Cocoa Butter lotion and oil all over my body; Palmer's, Body Shop and Fruits of the Earth. The earlier I start, the better chances of not getting any stretch marks. Or so I thought.

Fifth month came, no stretch mark.

Sixth month, no stretch mark.

Seventh month, why, hello there slight stretch mark on my hips.

Eighth month, what are you doing on my thighs, stretch mark?!

Ninth month, nothing. I thought that was it. Boy, was I wrong.

Two weeks after I gave birth, more appeared on my tummy. Then I told myself, hey, it's not so bad. I have a baby now, that's what matter. But that didn't stop me from looking for remedies.

After reading about Bio Oil and its testimonials, I decided to give it a try. Didn't put too much hope on it as stretch marks are known to be very difficult to get rid off (unless you have money to spend for laser treatment!).

The Bio Oil insert says to apply twice daily for a minimum of 3 months to reduce the appearance of scars/stretch marks. I'm into my second month of using it, and I must say I'm quite pleased with the result so far. The marks are still there, but not as visible anymore. Let's see the outcome after the third month is up.